Sexy doctor stories

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Laurie took off her shoe. There was a little blood on the white sock, but not much. When she took off the sock, we looked at the puncture wound.

Fortunately, it was quite shallow. It just broke the skin really. But look at that nail," she added, pointing toward the scene of the crime. She let out a long sigh of dread and disgust.

She put her sock and shoe back on, and we walked back to the van, fortunately without further incident. I had both dogs. As we drove to the clinic, Laurie was silent.

She was obviously brooding over what was about to happen. When we arrived, we were told the wait would be about ten or fifteen minutes. Laurie was not particularly brave when it came to doctor visits.

There were many unpleasant and embarrassing procedures that could be performed on one's person during those visits.

She tended to dwell on these unpleasant thoughts while waiting to be admitted, tormenting herself with mental images of what she might soon have to do or what might soon be done to her.

She had confessed all this to me in the past, so I had a pretty good idea what was going through her mind at this moment. The expression on her face did not reflect serenity.

But then despite her doom-and-gloom mood, a thought of a different kind occurred to her, for the moment dispelling her depressing reverie. She cocked her head slightly a gave me one of her wry smiles.

You can see my rump any time you want at home. Much sexier when at an unusual time or in an unusual setting--when I normally can't expect sexy vistas like that.

Anyway, be brave. You wouldn't want me to have to hold you over my knee in order for the nurse to give you the shot. Sitting here waiting makes it all the worse.

Knowing what's going to happen. At least you won't have to bare your bottom for the doctor. Finally, we were called into the exam room.

Laurie sat on the exam table while the nurse took her blood pressure. The look on Laurie's face left me in no doubt that she was still fretting over what was to come.

The doctor made his entrance. Laurie explained what had happened and told him when she had gotten her last tetanus shot. The doctor ordered the nurse to give her a booster and left the room.

Well, that was one positive note for Laurie. The nurse left the room briefly and returned with the hypodermic needle. Then she turned and looked at me.

With just a hint of annoyance, Laurie was the one to respond. You think he'll see something he never saw before?

Besides he wouldn't leave anyway. At this point I chimed in and added, "We believe in the idea of a family doctor and we go to a doctor together, as a family.

The nurse made no comment on this philosophy. Instead, now resigned to my presence, she simply turned to Laurie.

These shots work much better in your bottom. It would really hurt in your arm, especially for a woman without the amount of muscle a man has.

Sometimes the female of the species seems to be utterly naive about how sexy something they say so innocently can sound. But the nurse's command hit me with devastating force.

Since it put my mind into such high gear on the subject of sex, I thought I would have some fun. I saw a slight change of expression on the nurse's face and heard what probably was as close to a giggle as she was capable of producing after all her years of nursing.

Well, I was pleased that I had not lost my ability to make people laugh. Laurie, however, just turned her head toward me. She had blushed slightly, and her expression shot a few daggers my way.

I think she was a little embarrassed. But the moment passed. Laurie was now obviously nervous about the shot. The procedure the nurse had had in mind should not have been difficult.

Laurie should have reached up under her skirt and pulled down her panties first, then flipped her skirt up. Instead, she pulled her skirt up and leaned over the table.

Almost immediately, she realized the problem, but the nurse came to her rescue: "Just hold your skirt up, dear.

I'll take care of your panties. Laurie was by now quite embarrassed, but not because of me. When the nurse had asked earlier whether I wanted to leave, she had things just backwards.

Laurie was not embarrassed to bare her bottom to me but to the nurse! Anyway, she was not suffering physically during this visit, so I allowed myself the enjoyment of this heavenly sight.

Laurie had her skirt up over her derriere and was leaning over the exam table. Her panties, still in place, were the clear focus of the scene.

Panties: in my opinion, the sexiest item in the delightful array of her intimate apparel. Dr Marc Gillinov Report. I once had the daughter of one of my patients march up to the nursing station, slam the vitals chart down on the desk and yell at me "How dare you say my mother stinks" I'm utterly puzzled by this as no-one had said anything of the sort and ask the daughter to explain what she meant, she grabs the chart, points to the row of "BO's" recorded on it and shouts "Here you even had the nerve to write it down" I explained that "BO" meant Bowels Open not body odour before escaping to the staff room to laugh my head off.

Patient was a young child who came in with an extremely high Blood Glucose level. Once she was stable we did some teaching and kept her for a few days for observation.

For some reason every-time I checked her, her levels would be extremely high although we were appropriately treating her.

Turns out her family would bring her fast food for every meal and hide it in the side table. More teaching and resources were put into place.

It's tragic when parents cannot parent because their kid will get upset. If you don't love your child enough to say no, why have children?

They're killing their kid. Not a doctor but I was a Nurse's assistant and a kitchen staff member came in and said "Help, I ate raw corn".

Apparently the cook had convinced him that eating raw corn was poisonous or something. I had a good laugh about it.

BallisticWinter Report. I'm a med student but I once saw a patient in the ER who came in because she lost her vibrator inside herself.

It was still on. She sat in the waiting room for over an hour with that thing in there. Pra Report. Probably the most pleasant emergency waiting room experience anyone has ever had.

My mom's an ER nurse and she said once some crazy lady came in and complained hat she had the whooping cough. And whenever she coughed she followed it with a loud "woooOOOP!

KingJonathan Report. A memorable lady was utterly convinced that her friend got cancer because she quit smoking not because she was a smoker This lady had a mild goitre, and her reason for not quitting was that if she quit smoking the 'lumps in my neck would turn to cancer'.

Could not be convinced otherwise. Then I referred her to ENT for her hoarse voice and she was surprised how fast she was seen.

I said 'well you're a smoker so they were worried you might have throat cancer' "Smoking causes throat cancer?!?!

I always needed a strong coffee after her. Quitting is always better than smoking. The "sickness" people develop is called withdrawal.

You're not more sick after you quit. I smoke for 30 years and have been free of it for over three years. A mother came in with her son to discuss treating his acne.

Son was about 15 years old and didn't really care about the acne, but mom did. After going over treatment options, she asked if he just needed to 'do it' to get rid of the acne.

A grown woman, with a child, thought that by him having sex, his acne would magically go away.. My mum once had to try explain to a doctor that regardless of tests she has celiacs because google said that if you have celiacs you get sick when eating bread, she just wouldn't accept that as you get older you can't eat half a loaf of bread in one sitting.

I have never seen a doctor want to kill themselves more. GreenGlit Report. There was a nursing student I had once who laughed loudly and exclaimed 'How can you possibly get an STD in your mouth?

Medical student here. Her logic was that the tumour was at the same corresponding spot in her lung to where she bumped her chest.

She was convinced we were wrong about the cause. I had a Marine come in because he swallowed a rock. I am not a doctor, but I do work at a doctor's office.

So a person came in with conjunctivitis. They proceeded to ask questions on how it was transmitted. With the most serious look on their face, they asked if it was contagious and can be passed on by glare.

That would be so d frightening Nari91 Report. Not a doctor but work in pharmacy. An old guy who had got an inhaler prescribed by his GP because he was allergic to his new dog.

He came back to the pharmacy and said he was still completely breathless around the dog despite using the inhaler four times a day.

On further question it transpired that four times a day he was spraying the dogs coat with the ventolin inhaler.

Fudball1 Report. Another joke from House MD. In the show, a lady with asthma thought an inhaler is used like a perfume.

My wife has works in a gyno and has told me of many patients trying to get pregnant who needed to be told what went where, specifically that the anus is not a baby-maker.

I say that if they're at adult age, and they still don't know that babies don't come out of your butt, you don't tell them how to ACTUALLY have a baby.

At least not before a spay or neuter. He said he was not willing to give this up or try decaf. Can the body really manage so much caffeeine?

I mean, that's more than a cup of coffee per waking hour. Paramedic here. Was driving with my partner and patient in the back.

Patient was fine. Patient's skeezy boyfriend was riding in the front with me and apparently saw a golden opportunity to ask a question that had obviously been on his mind for some time.

Him: So when cats and dogs eat grass, that means they have cancer, right? Me: Ummm. No it does not. Made for an awkwardly silent ride the rest of the way.

When he brought the many pieces back to the optometrist to have the glasses replaced, the assistant asked what had happened.

Susan Strong Report. Me coming out of anesthesia: "Man, you're handsome. He paused a second, then thanked me. Kgencks Report. I woke up from anesthesia and asked the nurse what mascara she was wearing.

I woke up from anethesia and started talking about my ex to the nurse. Apparently I also saw a picture of my throat and asked if it was a dinosaur.

Might be late to this, but a 17 year old girl who was pregnant and came into the emergency department to get checked as she was punched in the stomach.

She wanted to go out for a smoke so I did the whole pregnancy and smoking spiel, she stopped me and told me I knew nothing as the baby would be harmed if she stopped smoking straight away.

I posted this a while back when a similar question was asked: GP here. The most outrageous thing I've heard was from a boy who was something like years old.

Very poor, illiterate family. The boy had a bad case of tonsilitis and refused to take any meds because all he needed to do was "bite the sun".

Basically at noon he had to look up to the sun, open his mouth as wide as possible and "bite" the sun several times so it would "burn" his tonsils and cure him over the course of a couple weeks.

When that wouldn't work, plan B was to do the same at night but only under a full moon. I had to explain to a grown man I still work with that tampons don't break down in a woman's urine after they were finished using them.

He's been married 12 years. It was not his best day. Had to explain to an adult you have to brush all the sides of a teeth. And yes flossing is not just a thing for rich people.

There was a guy who came to the ER because his iPhone app told him his sleep was poor quality. XLpho Report. Had a young woman with recurring UTIs that began after a recent partner and with no STDs; went through the standard questions trying to figure out what could be causing them and eventually found out she had been lubricating with jelly.

Not KY jelly. The mixup had literally been a joke on House. It took me some effort to keep a straight face, but we eventually resolved the problem and she stopped getting UTIs.

My fiance is an X-ray tech. He gets weird cases all the time. He had to do a head CT on someone who came into the ER because she took two marijuana tablets and wondered why her head was foggy and she felt slow moving Face palm.

They're used for many pain pgt patients who have Multiple sclerosis there's one called marinol. Not a doctor but my dad is an opthamologist eye doctor.

He once told me that one of his patients came in utterly confused why the "medicine in his glasses no work anymore. My friend is a student doctor and is on placement at a small town doctor's office.

She had a ish year old woman come in with complaints of a small but painless growth that was visible at the back of her throat. Turns out it took her 70 years to notice her uvula.

What is it with people who don't notice their uvulas? Do they never look in the mirror? A male patient inyected kitchen oil into his own cheeks because he saw a plastic surgery tv show where a surgeon inyected something similar to a model, then he was amazed that the bumps of the oil didnt go away and were turning red and painful af.

AvalonAPV Report. Ran to the dermatologist because of a spot on my butt that I thought might be cancerous. Doc looked me in the eye and said "Phil, that's a pimple".

Phil Report. I was reaching around in someone's sheets for a lost tube of blood and accidentally grabbed his erect?! It was unfortunate. I've asked her several times why she's yelling waiting to see if she's in any pain and her answers range from "I didn't know I was yelling," to "It's a habit.

Was translating at a medical clinic once. A father brought in his year old son convinced he had early signs of diabetes since his hair was greasy.

After convincing thr doctor that's what he was actually there for, we told him to go take a shower and try different shampoo : its sad how little some people know about diabetes.

I'm a rural family doc doing locums and was working at a city family practice clinic when I saw this patient.

When did you last have a heart attack that this feels like" Pt: "I haven't had one before. But I get this pain every time I have my period.

And I've sent my mom to the ER twice with the same pain before so I know it's a heart attack" She was a non smoker who had no comorbidities, very noncardiac sounding chest pain, no risk factors and her mother that was sent in to the ED, had an EKG, no bloodwork and sent home shortly after though patient swears both episodes were heart attacks.

Radiographer here and had the ED doctor give me a request for soft tissue neck X-rays and the doctor was p much like "don't question it, just do it.

The patient basically burnt his tongue but was insisting on a X-ray to ensure nothing is wrong. I popped a boner on the nurse prepping me for a vasectomy During the procedure the doc kept referring to my member as Mr.

Happy and talking about how hot the nurse was. The nurse was still on the room btw. Gynecologist here.

Imagine a revved up version of that dreadlocked beanie-wearing woman meme: "Uh, it's not vuh-JI-nah anymore, it's pronounced vaah-ZHEE-nah now.

Not a Doctor, but EMT. I feel like our doctors should not assists those couples to have children.

If you can not figure out how sex works, dont raise children thx. I'm not a doctor, but I'm an ER nurse. Progressing through my assessment she further divulged that even if he was sleeping with other people it shouldn't matter "because he uses a condom every time and he makes sure to wash it throughly after every use.

She explained that he washed the condom with hot water and soap before he used said condom again Bored Panda works best if you switch to our Android app.

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Most of these a a fiery statement for decent sex ed!! Procreation and preventing it and the human body are so important and complex, it's really not something one should kinda pick up by themselves.

And most parents are not qualified to cover all of the facts. Comprehensive, factual sex education including contraceptives needs to be mandatory in middle school and every year after.

This comment is hidden. Click here to view. Why stupidity? Most of the cases are simple misunderstandings whose can happen to anyone.

The whole "pissing in her to try and get her pregnant" doesn't exactly fit the profile of "simple misunderstanding". Sure, better sex ed and whatnot could help and you can't know everything but some things should be basic common knowledge Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app.

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When she is not photoshopping or searching for the most interesting photos for stories, she is usually watching good movies and says that The Godfather is the best.

My mind is so confused by being moved tweet after tweet. An overwhelming mixture of the happy endings and the not so happy endings.

All shared by wonderful people from whom I'll try to take an inspiration in my life now on, even though I don't work in the medical field.

Thank you. Honestly - normally I upvote or downvote almost everything I pass when reading these lists - this time I just didn't even think of it after the first two or three because I was too overwhelmed by their content.

True, this page 8, and I am drowned in some strong emotions which were quite unknown to me till this day.

Like Pamela24 said, its a mixed feeling of being sad and joyful at same time. Being a doctor or a nurse or an EMT personal etc is such a tough job.

I was once admitted to a burns unit and all patients around be were severely burned, I had a small but 3rd degree burn, for 2 days I heard the screams of agony from nearby beds and rooms, I saw family members crying at the state of their loves one.

I have no idea how people who actually work there for whole lives manage such experiences. I just gave up being able to comment - all heartbreaking.

I just hope so much that when my time comes, or in an emergency, I am in the care of someone as great as all these.

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